And Abraham Went Out . . .

Lenten Check-In

(Warning: this gets long at the end. I begin to share my heart. Yikes.)

Outside my window . . .

Blue sky, sunshine, and snow! I do believe the temps are rising! Woop, woop. Now if I can just muster the oomph to get us dressed to venture out there. I know, its weird. Me, the outdoors girl has had no motivation to get the kids and I outside. I'm thinking it started with this super looonnngg ear infection I've battled for a month now. Yes, dear MIL, do not freak out. Nothing has burst, no fever ever came, I have not lost my hearing. It just took a long time to heal and many days of garlic-infused ear drops. But it is gone! Yeah but somewhere along the way, I lost my motivation. I'm sure it will come back. Well, at least I know spring will lure us out. The HUGE garden will beckon!

I'm listening to . . .

Mr. Basil chatting with me, a simmering pot on the stove, and a load in the washer. Sage and Nutmeg are playing in the back someplace.

These are a few of my favorite things . . . 

Nutmeg's life narratives. Oh, how it cracks me up! A good portion of the day Nutmeg narrates her day. "Mommy did such and such and then Nutmeg said "Such and such."  I really should get it on video. Posting videos doesn't work on the blog so well; I've tried it. Sorry gmas.

In the kitchen . . .

a pot of chicken broth is simmering for the day. Maybe my last batch before we move. Then I can make big batches and put them in the freezer in the garage.  Whoop, whoop!


The boys and I are reading . . .

"My Father's Dragon" by Ruth Stiles Gannett.

Learning, learning all the time . . .

Moving along. The next item up in our math studies is an introduction to multiplication. I'm thinking we need to review a bit first. Perhaps I'll have time another day to share some of our other studies.

On my heart and in my prayers . . .

Lent. I do have to say that I appreciate the seasons/cycles that I have seen in some of the Christian faith traditions. I grew up, of course, celebrating Christmas and Easter. I loved it!  But in Ecclesiastes we read there is "an appointed time for everything. . . . A time to tear down and a time to build up. A time to weep and a time to laugh. A time to mourn and a time to dance." So there are times not just for the celebrating of Christ's birth at Christmas and Christ's resurrection at Easter but there are also times to remember the end of the world, Christ's long fast and testing in the desert, and his journey to the cross. If I get to join in the joyous celebrations, should I not also join in the somber times as well?

But there is more than that, right? It's not just sobriety for the sake of sobriety. Look at the natural seasons of the earth for example. We plant in the spring, the plants grow in the summer, they die and lie dormant in the autumn and winter. There could be no new growth in the spring if there was no death in the winter right? There would be no sunrise if there sunset and the dark of night. 

So what is the purpose of these somber seasons of Advent and Lent? Goodness, I have years left of learning left but here's what I've learned so far. Advent is a time of preparation. A time to ask myself if I am ready for the return of Christ and in that preparation for Christ's second return I also prepare to celebrate his first coming. And Lent? There is much I don't understand but here is what I've learned this year.

Sacrifice deepens and stretches my capacity for love.  I thought I knew a little of love. Then I had children. Raising children forces one into sacrifice. Bodily sacrifice, emotional sacrifice, sacrifice of time, etc. But these sacrifices, as difficult as they are have a huge positive impact on our lives. We are forced to grow. By being forced to give more of ourselves for the benefit of our children, our capacity for love deepens and widens. We are capable of so much more than if we hadn't been forced to sacrifice.

The same goes with our love for God. During Lent we determine to pray, fast, and give. We purposely set out to let ourselves be stretched for the purpose of love.

As I mentioned earlier, my capacities here are so small. I haven't learned how to subject my bodily desires for food and entertainment. I often enter into Lent not ready for its somberness and sacrifice. Of course, I want to grow in my capacity for love for God but gosh darnit, I'm so weak. :)

But praise be to God, He does meet us in our weakness. He gives us something. In my SMALL sacrifices He still teaches me!

This year I wasn't prepared for Lent. I wasn't sure how to approach it. Frankly it came so fast I didn't have time to give it much thought. I couldn't give up facebook  because I had deactivated my account last fall. I already don't eat sweets because my body doesn't tolerate sugar well. Those our my usual "sacrifices." What else?

A sacrifice of time? I ordered a Lenten study for us as a family. That's been fantastic. I also ordered a challenging book for my spiritual life. God has already been using that in wonderful ways!

Complaining. Oh my. It's not my usual tangible "sacrifice." But yes, that one is obvious. I'm going with it.

It's been tough. Funny how we decide to give up something and then we notice it at every turn. The Lenten readings are filled with repentance. Confronting our sin. Then I see this sin in my children and think "Oh goodness, I think they have an example with this one." Ouch, Lord.

Last week we were discussing our family Lenten devotional/story and something occurred to me. I voiced it out loud. If ever I had said something wise, this was it. Lol. Doug and I both reflected on the idea and it has stuck with me every since. In fact, it has become a theme in my prayers and reflections. I am very thankful for this theme. Daily I'm seeing it crop up in Scriptures I read, reflections on my own sin, and in situations with my children.

It was this:  If there are two things that God desires from us, or gifts He would have us give Him, they would be OBEDIENCE and THANKFULNESS. 

Yes! The two big ones that have come to me. I'm sure there are a couple more but these are huge. See for yourself. I know that some of you have a daily Bible reading regime. You see that right? You see it everywhere. He desires our obedience and our gratitude/thankfulness.

It makes sense, right? If I could ask for gifts from my own young children, it would be the same: obedience and thankfulness. They have no idea that if they just obeyed it would work for their own benefit. I desire all good things for them. That's just about right. In this economy of God's Kingdom, I am just about a child. Those two basic gifts are just about right for me.

It makes a whole lot of sense when it comes to the sins I see in myself (and probably the sins I don't see). Complaining. Why do I complain? Perhaps because my eyes are blind to all that is mine. Discontent. I'm not satisfied with all he has given me and all that He is. He love is laid wide open for me.

And what about obedience? This one I could think on more. What must I obey? For sure I'd be kept busy with the basic commands He gives. Basic commands that we as Christians know or can find. Basic but not easy. Have no other gods before me. Love your neighbor. Feed the hungry. Clothe the naked. Forgive.

But I also know that if work to quiet my mind and block out the distractions, the Spirit WILL whisper words of instruction. I know it. How about a basic one? Have no other gods before me. Couple that with blocking out distractions and I've got a full-time job on my hands. Seriously. For me to obey is not let myself get distracted by technology and information. The darn internet right? Oh man, its great but how often does the Spirit want to speak but my hands are too busy on the keyboard wanting to search this and that. Sure, research needs to be done but balance, balance, balance.

Obedience. If I have the computer open in the morning to read the daily Scripture readings, I KNOW the Spirit will nudge when I go to check my email. Obedience.  Focus on these life-giving words. You have plenty of time to check email later. Do this first.

Anyhow, I have my work cut out for me this Lent. It's on my heart and in my prayers. I'm just a weak child. These small "sacrifices" of thanksgiving and obedience will keep my busy for a long, long time. I hope these next couple weeks I'll stretch a bit more in my capacity for love for our Savior Jesus Christ. This is my chance to grow. Pray that I'll make the most of this season, so that in the reaping time there will some fruit to show of it. Frankly, its so much easier to sit back and take a nap. But where will another nap get me?

And . . . something cute at the end for good measure.