NFP Awareness Week

Our Experience


I'm thinking that NFP (natural family planning) awareness week is just ending. This morning a thought popped into my head, "I should lift my little voice in honor of the week." So I'll give it a go. Oh, I'm sure this could cause a few to wriggle in their seats and others' hackles could be raised but well, its my blog.
Wahoo! I can do as I please. Anyhow, I think most of you are life-long friends and family and will love me anyhow. Yeah for love!

Let me say this, I guess I'd like to think I'm a somewhat non-judgmental person. I could very, very well be mistaken in this presumption. Oh, I definitely have some strong opinions/beliefs in a number of areas and don't mind sharing them with others at times. If you believe something is good, then why not share with others? But at the same time, I realize that everyone is in a different place. We also have different histories, environment, goals, and exposure. There are so many more circumstances in life that places us at a particular chapter in our story of life.

I know that I am a person with a multitude of short-comings, faults, and blind spots. I surely hope that other don't expect perfection from me and in turn, I hope that I don't expect perfection in others. We can just encourage each other to reach onward and upward, right?

All that to say, if you aren't gung ho about NFP like I am, no worries. I'm not going stalk you with my convictions. I believe in it with all my heart but I'm not about to force anything on anybody. We all have our own decisions to make.

Anywho, our story. Doug and I have used NFP for our nine years of marriage. Actually after the boys were born, it was essential to learn the Creighton Model because of a couple reasons that I'd be glad to share. In any case, we have planned our family size naturally for nine years. We have conceived three times and all three were planned pregnancies. I want to say that the accuracy rate for NFP/Creighton Model is in the high 90th percentile; higher than both the pill and condoms. IF. USED. CORRECTLY. Doug and I were highly motivated and dedicated to plan naturally, so it has worked for us. I know that a large number of women have cycles that can just go nutty. There are definitively great resources for women who are in this position.

So let me tell you the little story of how this began for us. One evening Doug and I were talking by our cars outside a friend's house in Rochester, MN. I doubt we had even been dating a month (we dated maybe two months total!). I forget the exact topic we were discussing but at one point as we are sitting on the curb one of us says, "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" And the other says something like "No, we can't talk about this. We're barely dating." We go back and forth and then spill the beans. "I don't believe in birth control!" says one. "Really? Me too!" says the other. I can remember feeling so relieved and kind of had the "green light" to look further into if this guy could be "the one." You don't find this conviction often. At this point my reasons were health reasons and Doug's moral.

Soon thereafter we got to thinking that there must be some way to do this "naturally." So we went to Barnes and Nobles to look in the family/parenting section to find a book that might help us learn how to plan naturally. We stumbled upon "The Art of Natural Planning." Perfect! We bought the book and started studying. I also supplemented that book with "Taking Charge of Your Fertility." We studied the method and I waited nervously for our wedding day. I was definitely nervous if this was really going to work. We took it slowly, observed carefully and followed all the rules. It worked! We conceived our first babies one year later when we had planned to have our first baby. The book didn't say anything about getting TWO at the same time! Now that wasn't fair! lol!

NFP observes daily rising temperature (among other signs) and requires certain sleep habits. Well, any sleep habits I had had were thrown out the window when the boys were born. I certainly could not afford to get pregnant again with two newborns. Plus, I was breastfeeding which throws off a women's cycle and signs. AND I was on coumadin (an anti-coagulant) which causes birth defects. We seriously needed help. We signed up for private classes on the Creighton Model in Rochester. The Creighton Model is a very scientific method developed by Dr. Hilgers and a number of doctors around the world have been trained in this system. It uses mucus observation in a very regulated, systematic approach. It was a tough year learning this method but we did it by the grace of God!

After nine years I can say that I would NEVER do this any other way. I am confident Doug would say the same. I have never had to mess with my system with the pill. So glad about that! I've learned so much about my body and Doug has learned much about how a woman's body works as well. Using these methods forces us to communicate and work together. We talk about our wishes/desires and collaborate together. We believe that planning a family naturally is the best way for a marriage and for society as a whole. And it allows a couple to give their WHOLE lives to each other AND to God. Them's big words, I know. I don't have time to be too eloquent (not sure if I am EVER eloquent) because I gotta get lunch on for these three little blessings (four if you count the one in the oven). Let me leave you with a few quotes and passages I find interesting. And if you made it this far and disagree, please try not to be offended. That's the last thing I would want.

Genesis 1:28
"Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth and subdue it . . . "

Psalms 127
"Lo, sons are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward."

"In applying this scientific knowledge to regulating fertility, technology in no way substitutes for the involvement of the persons and neither does it intervene by manipulating the nature of the relationship, as is the case with contraception in which the unitive meaning of the conjugal act is deliberately separated from its procreative meaning. To the contrary, in practicing natural methods science must always be joined with self-control, since, in using them, virtue-that perfection belonging specifically to the person-in necessarily a factor.
       Thus we can say that periodic continence, practiced to regulate procreation in a natural way, requires a profound understanding of the person and of love. In truth, that requires mutual listening and dialogue by spouses, attention, sensitivity for the other spouse and constant self-control: all of these are qualities which express real love for the person of the spouse for what he or she is, and not for what one may wish the other to be. The practice of natural methods requires personal growth by the spouses in a joint effort to strengthen their love." JPII   

"I urge advocates of artificial methods to consider the consequences. Any large use of the methods is likely to result in the dissolution of the marriage bond and in free love."
-Mahatma Gandhi, 1925 

"Carried to its logical conclusion, the committee's report (to allow martial contraception) if carried into effect wold sound the death-knell of marriage as a holy institution, by establishing degrading practices which would encourage indiscriminate immorality. The suggestion that the use of legalized contraception would be "careful and restrained" is preposterous.
-Editorial in the Washington Post, 22 March 1931

"Readers of that novel soon realize that the whole of society of Brave New World is built upon the technology of sex."
-The Art of Natural Family Planning *(I read it this year and can vouch for this statement)

"In 1910, the year of the last general census before Margaret Sanger began promoting contraception, the divorce rate was one divorce for every 11.4 marriages. By 1977, there was one divorce for every two marriages."

"I know that couples have to plan their family and for that there is natural family planning. The way to plan the family is natural family planning, not contraception. In destroying the power of giving life through contraception a husband or wife is doing something to self. This turn the attention to self and so destroys the gift of love in him or her. In loving, the husband and wife must turn the attention to each other, as happens in natural family planning, and not to self, as happens in contraception. Once that living love is destroyed by contraception, abortion follows very easily."
-Mother Theresa

If this has peaked the interest of anyone out there, there is an excellent lecture on CD out there that I believe you can order for free. It is called "Contraception, why not?" by Janet Smith. Janet Smith is a Catholic Christian but for those of you who are not of the Catholic tradition (I am not either), I do not think you will find yourself in disagreement or put off by what she says. It is very common sense goodness in there!